The Sticky Sweethearts - The First Time I Saw Your Dad Nude
LYRICS
I’m just chillin’ half-mast under your bed
I’ve been sitting in darkness
Since has past ten
I finally hear the door open,
It’s your dad!
He heard me rip ass…
And now I’m dead
Oh! He threw the mattress across the room
Your mama was crying
And your dad was nude (tight!)
At this point, my boner was dead (so dead!)
I didn’t even get to say “I love you” again
That was the first time…(whoa-oh!)
Oh, it was the worst time…(whoa-oh!)
Oh, That was the first time
I saw your dad nude.
I saw his balls and butthole too
I asked if he needed any glue
He got so mad, I didn’t know what to do
So I emptied the glue
Onto your mother’s boobs (tight!)
That was the first time…(whoa-oh!)
Oh, it was the worst time…(whoa-oh!)
Oh, That was the first time
I saw your dad nude.
I thought he was gonna have a stroke
When he glued his balls to the back of my throat
He screamed “Glue is for crafts! Not balls and ass!”
Girl, that’s when you finally walked in and screamed…
“Dad! What the fuck, what the fuck,
Oh my God! Holy shit! Jesus Christ! Ew!”
It’s not what it looks like!
Your father tried to break my neck with no remorse
Your mama was screaming that she wants a divorce
When his balls unglued from the back of my throat
Thats when I got down on one knee to propose…
But hold on, girl!
Before you answer…
I must ask your dad
If I can take his daughter’s hand.
I guess I’m just old fashioned like that
He said no, no, no…
That was the first time…(whoa-oh!)
Oh, it was the worst time…(whoa-oh!)
Oh, That was the first time
I saw your dad nude.
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