A Good Place

no joy of life no sign of pain i undergo depression every fucking day l lick armpits of my fate scrolling the endless list of options i wouldn’t ever want in the first place i drag the feeling of emptiness and pointlessly continue to ruminate on every single thing the beautiful swing that’s about 1/8 gives an impression of an infinite change although the simulation part cannot be forgotten the strict german pattern follows me during the whole journey of being i’ve no courage to accept that i’m in a good place i’ve no courage to accept that i’m in a good place suspended tears a metal taste of longing escort me back home. i can’t employ kindness anymore. i also can’t mourn, the spike in my chest started twisting. i only wish that it would impale the remains of my heart will writing a diary help me? i descend very low into the dark and watery pit of an existential ambiguity i’m guilty i’m guilty i’m guilty i’ve no courage to suspect that i’m in a good place i’ve no courage to accept that i’m in a good place